Do me, but please do not have a voice as deep as mine

Written on 3/23/2008 – 5:59 pm | by keysinunez.com | 538 Views

Cold beer. That’s what it was. Nothing like a cold beer to end a long day. Back in the old days, he was a record holder for downing the most bottles of beer in 10 minutes! When it came to drinking marathons, he was always the last man standing. When they went out clubbing, his tab always had the most number of digits because he drank too much. It was just his fourth bottle and he was starting to feel a bit full.

He started drinking when he was sixteen. By the time he turned nineteen, he was a Beer Drinking Title Holder. He found it weird that at 26, he was having difficulty handling his drink. He laughed. Maybe I peaked to early, he thought as he drank the entire contents of the bottle in just one swig. He signaled the bartender for another bottle while chewing thoughtfully on some peanuts.

He looked around and found that the bar was almost full. Tonight is ladies night Bub, the bartender said with a haughty grin. Aye mate, chided the balding guy two seats away from him.

He smiled. He didn’t want to be around women. He was looking forward to a night of man-talk and several beers. It wasn’t because he was one of them pathetic losers who couldn’t get any girlfriends or get laid. On the contrary, he was a handsome fellow, slightly tanned, tall at five feet eleven inches, and sported shoulder length wavy hair. He wore baggy corduroy cargo pants and a tight shirt to show off his fully-tattooed arms. He swiveled on his seat and handed a 20-dollar bill to the bartender.

Just as he was standing up, he caught sight of a petite, young lady sitting at the end of the bar. She was absentmindedly stirring her drink. She looked lost in thought and lonely.

Normally, he didn’t approach girls. The girls always do the approaching, but this time, he felt as if he was being pulled to her. He could see the radiance of her white skin, the pouty lips, the dreamy eyes, the curves of her face. He felt himself being sucked in by her beauty. He let his eyes devour her image.

She was wearing a red silk dress, revealing her cleavage. The dress itself seemed to have a life of its own. It had small sequined black flowers with their leaves and stalk in a darker shade of red. When she moved, the flowers seemed like they were blowing in the wind. Her hair was cut short in order to reveal her pretty face. Although fixed to her drink, her eyes seemed to sparkle, even in sadness.

He sighed. She was the girl of her dreams! Physically, she satisfied his taste and ideal. Like a hot babe who just had a San Francisco plastic surgery. In a moment, he would know if she also had the brains to match her beauty. He wanted to talk to her, argue with her, mindfuck her just to see if she was as smart as he was. When he was done raping her image with his mind, he gulped his beer and sucked on his cigarette.

He boldly made his way to her, his eyes fixed on her face. She didn’t notice him, or pretended not to. He slid on the seat beside her, his eyes still glued to her. Up close, he marveled at the smoothness and whiteness of her skin. He also saw that she had several piercings on her ear, and a tattoo on her left shoulder - blue and red stars. He felt himself getting weak as he continued to absorb all her details. He felt himself getting aroused as the image of him coveting her played on and on in his mind.

He looked at her eyes and was about to offer her a drink when he heard a deep, crass voice say, what the fuck are you staring at? He instinctively turned sideways to confront the arrogant ass who dared to disturb his line when he realized that the girl was looking at him, and she had this questioning look on her face. Holy motherfucker!, he shouted and ran to his car.


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  1. One Response to “Do me, but please do not have a voice as deep as mine”

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  3. By Sorbetera on Jun 12, 2008 | Reply

    ROFL!!! I love the way you wrote this!! *applauds* Though I kind of knew what was going to happen because of the title, I still enjoyed reading your descriptions. Good work! :)

    I suddenly remember that YouTube video.. oh wait, I don't remember the title anymore. gahh... But still, great post! haha!

    (and just because I'm a curious idiot... did this actually happen? hahaha)

    Sorbetera's last blog post..Cabal Online Madness

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Who the heck is Keysi Nunez?

Keysi Nunez writes short and not so short stories about the not so important events in his life. This site contains musings, ramblings, and what-not. More

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